08/20/2026
I turned 70 today. I expect I will finally retire from working in 4 months – sometime in January of 2027. I started taking my Social Security benefits at the 66 and 4 months (12/20/2022) “full retirement age” for my birth year, and used the monthly cash to pay off all credit cards and as much home debt as feasible. I want my wife to be positioned well when my time comes.
I always half joked that she was my retirement plan, as she is 25 years younger than I, but I want to plan to be hers as well.
It’s weird to look mortality in the eyes. It never blinks. I try my best not to as well.
These last 4 years I have felt myself start to age. All the fun I had as a youth, has come back to me in both memories, and concerns. My multiple head injuries have me wondering about possible dementia ahead. My car accidents and other injuries seem to be exacerbating the level of arthritis in my body – knees, hands, and shoulders to be sure. In addition, my lower back is in a precarious state.
That’s the bad, but there is good to. Kasi makes me very happy, we have been traveling finally, and expect to take 2 months in Europe in the summer of 2027.
Back to my mortality. I always hoped I would live into my 90s, and I still hope so, though I worry my body will not hold up past 80. When I am gone, my biggest hope is that Kasi will not be alone. She should not hesitate to try to love again. I also hope John and Veronica will remain in touch with Kasi, as she loves them deeply. She also loves her friends, and I hope they stay in her life as well.
Kasi is naturally an introvert, but still loves her people when she is with them. Be patient, but continue nudging her.
Things are getting back to normalcy after the pandemic, and European wars. The coup by the Russian people was slow in starting, but has turned the world around. Democracy is flourishing. Religious litmus test are falling away worldwide, as a new age of enlightenment seems to have come over the world.
The levels of hate and sectarian violence have dropped off dramatically, and the anti-education “Mini Dark Ages” was short lived. We seem to have dodged the vision of “Idiocracy” that for awhile seems inevitable.
My first, and probably only, novel was just published to zero fanfare or acclaim, but I finally did it – and not self published. Like the rest of the world, Fresno has gotten better – hotter, but better. I don’t envy the future for my kids, and I’m good without having grandchildren, as their future would be an unbearable cross to bear – at least at this point in time.
Hopefully the demise of the anti-education cults, will bring a rise of innovation, along with the arts that have already taken off. Technology is the only hope for the future of this planet, after the state the Russian war left it in.
I have hope, looking forward, but it is balanced by the reality of all the damage done in my lifetime.
I love you so much and I am grateful you and Kasi have each other. Thank you for sharing with me.
Sent from my iPhone
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